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Dear Love Doctor,

I feel like I have good self esteem, only now I am beginning to question that becuase it seems like the men who are attracted to me are losers.  I have tried different venues, concerts, happy, hour, picnics, travel.  Although, I am content with being single, I would love to have a companion to do fun things with.  I have been told I carry myself very well, and are very attractive.  But still I don't know what the target on my forehead is saying.  It seems the gold digger type ladies are getting thier way, but that is not my style.  .....suggestions please,

Gina - Bay Area

Love Doctor:

I love my wife and the mother of my two kids, but I am in need of physical contact other than a kiss and hug (it been about 8 months).Before we were married, it was whenever as soon as I walked thru the door, but now it is If she does give it to me, she just wants me to do it fast just to get it over. I am becoming sexually disenchanted with her. I haven't done anything yet, but I am getting closer to satisfying my urges, what do you suggest, am I wrong for wanting satisfaction? I talk about it, but I don't think anybody is listening to me.

Standing Strong - San Jose

Dear Love Doctor:

My husband and I are High school SWEET HEARTS and have been married for 3yrs now. Should I be WORRY if my husband rather edit his film footage then spend time with me on our anniversay, new years night and even on my BIRTHDAY?  

Lonely for love in San Jose

I have been in love with my highschool sweetheart all my life. We have had horrible timing (think Romeo and Juliet) and have left each other several time through out our lives but never due to lack of love.  We truely love each other.  I married someone else for 15 years and then divorced.  He never married always believing that I would come back to him and I did.  We live far from each other and have spent most of our lives without each other.  Now we are both single and were starting back to each other when he broke up with me not able to tell me why. I'm having a hard time moving on not knowing the reason why he called it off. I thought we would grow old together finally reuniting. What should I do?  Wait for him another 15 years? I don't want anyone else. Just focus on raising my kids and the memories of the past? Help.

Losing My Joy - East Bay

Love Doctor:

My 35-year old son and girlfriend, whom I only met once before, recently relocated from Texas and are temporarily living with me.  In the few months they have been here I realized that I don't like her; she's controlling, immature, insecure, puts him down especially when other people are present, and my biggest pet-peeve is she makes minimal attempts to cook for him and sits around waiting for me to cook the meals (she%u2019s his woman not me).  I've mentioned a few things to my son but for the most part stayed out of their  relationship issues and ignore their disagreements held in my presences, even though in my heart I want to smack him and scream "snap outta of it."  The Problem I don't want to be a butinsky mom, but he told me, THEY ARE TALKING MARRIAGE (O-M-G).  I figured I must have dropped this child too many times as a baby.  Sad to say but my first question was is she pregnant, she obviously wasn't sick she eats everything in the house.  I know  this is a huge, HUGE mistake.  I want to tell him don't  walk but run from this woman/child; this can only get worse, but I'm choosing to say, from the outside looking in you two need more time and you should delay that proposal. My son and I can usually talk about anything, but when it comes to love well, sorry doctor but you men are blind as a bat.  Wave a pretty face and tight skirt in front of most of you and we can usually call the shots (case and point the son)  I know I risk him not seeing the forest through the trees  but I feel I must say something if only to clear my own conscience; and to definitely say I told you so later.  What do you think?

Nancy - Palo Alto

Dear love Doctor, I have been in a relationship for about 2 1/2 years and thing been doing well he is a good family man, but what i dont like is that he said that when we go out to the club he wants to dance with other women and leave me sitting at the table and i feel its not right, so what should i do leave him and find somebody else or go dance with another guy.

Faye - Fremont

Dear Love Doctor:

Almost 2 yrs ago my husband of 20 years left me with 4 children. As the children were getting older, I was demanding more of his presence in our home. He felt he should be able to come and go as he pleased, as long as he wasn%u2019t doing anything wrong. I understood going to "work", but he'd call going to a studio session (with no pay) "work". After arguments and attitudes, he left to live with his family and has not returned. I've tried all that I know, and have cared for the children 100% during this time, but now I have completed the divorce papers. . Should I continue to wait for him, hoping he'll make a change in his life and return to this family? Or file the papers and move on?Signed, Only Days to a Decision.

Janice - Oakland

Dear Love Doctor:

 I've been seeing this Married man who  work with for the past six months. He claimed from the begging that he was in the  process of a divorce, but I've seen several signs that this was all a lie to get with me. I love this man very much and he claims that he loves me too, He has offered to give me a child, that I so badly wants. He is twenty three years older than me. I don't know if I should stay and continue to allow him to keep feeding false promisies or should I just let the whole relationship go. HELP!!!!!

Tina - S.F.

Dear Love Doctor:

The other day my boyfriend came over my house withi a hickey on his chest.  He had the nerves to say I put it on his chest which I know I didn't.  This man is 51 years old has eleven kids and his youngest child is two years old and this man is on SSI. I worked two jobs and take care of  myself.  I have been dating t his SCRUB for a year now.  At this time we are not speaking.  I told him don't call me until he tells me the truth about the hickey on his neck.  I know Im wasting my time with this SCRUB because he dosen't have his own place he stays in his Aunt's basement.

Vicki in Richmond

Dear Love Doctor:

I have been seeing this guy for about 8 years now and I really love this guy but he has never told me he loves me. He has never taken me around any of his friends. He plays in a band and has never asked me to come see him perform. I know he is not married because his wife passed a couple of years after my husband. Sometimes I want to just leave him alone and move on then there are times I say I am going to hang in there what should I do. Sometimes we can go weeks without talking and there are most of the time where being together is when he gets ready.

Lynette - Richmond

Help Me Love Doctor:

My soon to be wife and I both work in very competitive sales positions and we both have to entertain clients at expensive restaurants, etc.  Well often I find myself having to take some clients to strip clubs.  I always tell my fiance and she says she understands it's part of our business to make our clients happy and she knows I've closed some big deals at these places.  It never occurred to me that she has been taking clients to strip clubs as well until one of her former clients told me he had a "great time" with her when he was at another company she was handling.  I was stunned, and when I confronted her with it she said, "You're being a chauvenist and to get over it lot's of women take their male clients to strip clubs these days".  She doesn't get that I'm angry that she never bothered to tell me and she's done it while we've been together.  There are so many reasons I am po'd about this.  Do her clients get the wrong idea about her espcially with all the drinking going on as often accompanies a night like that.  I'm worried for her safety and why she wouldn't tell me ...this may be a deal breaker...what do you think?

Need to know - San Jose

Love Doctor:

My live-in boyfriend was cheating,and although he used a condom the woman became pregnant. The two of us are awaiting a paternity test, and trying to work things out concerning our relationship.In the mean time the woman is having a shower and want's his help financially.We don't feel we should do anything until paternity has been established. Is this right or wrong?

Scorned in Oakland

Dear Love Doctor:

My husband and I are High school SWEET HEARTS and have been married for 3yrs now. Should I be WORRY if my husband rather edit his film footage then spend time with me on our anniversay, new years night and even on my BIRTHDAY?  

Lonely for love in San Jose

Dear Love Doc, I've been with this guy for almost 3 yrs, I just found out he's married. He wants me to stay because he loves me, I want to end the relationship! I've been there done that before and ended that relationship now with this one I don't know what to do??
 

Undecided in Hercules

My live-in boyfriend was cheating,and although he used a condom the woman became pregnant. The two of us are awwaiting a paternity test, and trying to work things out concerning our relationship.In the mean time the woman is having a shower and want's his help financially.We don't feel we should do anything until paternity has been established. Is this right or wrong?

Debra - Oakland

Here's my issue:

My husband will not let my 15 year old daughter date until she is 17.  He is okay with her going on group outings but not a single dating situation.  I have been taking my daughter's side. She is mature, does well in school and at some point we will have to trust that she is going to have to make decisions someday.  My husband and I have had rather heated discussions about this but listens to your show and will abide by what the Love Doctor says ever since you convinced him not to hold my purse for me.

Okay Love Doctor - What say you?

Joyce in Oakland

Love Doctor:

I need your help.  Been with my girlfriend for  five years but recently she told me, either we get married or she walks.  Things have been fine, I've made hints that I do intend to marry her, but what's the rush, I've told her over and over again, she's the one but if she can't trust me that I'll do the right thing in my own time, does she really trust me at all?  We both don't want kids, we both have two kids from previous relationships and we're done with that so it's not like her biological clock is ticking.  Love Doc what's with women that they have to have that little piece of paper and that ring to feel like it's real?  Should I bite the bullet and give her what she wants?

Can't figure women out in Oakland

Dear Love Doctor:

My daughter is dating this man who is twice his her age, she's 22 he's 42.  I am still helping her pay for college and her apartment and have told her if she continues to see him I will cut her off.  I tell her there are plenty of men her age but she says they are all immature and she thinks she's in love with him.  Now he's got the nerve to tell her he'll help pay for her schooling and she can move in with him.  What is a mother to do? 

Gwendolyn - Daly City

Love Doc:

I've got two boyfriends one is on the West Coast - One is on the East Coast. I'm Bi-Coastal. They both are financially able to keep me in the lifestyle I am accustomed to, but really I can take care of myself.  My problem is East Coast man wants to settle down and have kids.  West Coast man likes the way things are.  They both satisfy me in different ways and would make the perfect man put together.  West Coast man is adventurous, fun, likes a little danger and is Mr. Fix it.  East Coast man is sweet brilliant with computers and wants to have kids (which I want to do eventually) but he wouldn't know a screwdriver from a piledriver.  I love them both and they know about each other but why do I have to decide ... I like having them both.  Love Doc what is a girl to do?

Bi-Coastal Jessica

Dear Love Doctor,

My wife is pregnant with our third and last child. It's gonna be a boy. I was overjoyed until she wanted to name him after her ex-boyfriend. She says since she's carrying the baby it's her choice to name the baby. I want to name the baby after me, what should i do?

James in Fremont

Love Doctor:

I am about to get married to my beatiful fiancee, but I'm starting to get cold feet.  I love her but I'm not sure I want to spend the rest of my life with her.  Lately my ex has been calling me up talking about how I was the one that got away and I'm starting to think, maybe she's the one that got away, but really though if I had both women combined that would be my dream girl.  Should I settle and go through with the wedding or should I call it off before I make a mistake?

Confused in Oakland

Love Doctor

I have been dating this boy for 4 months and my Mom and Dad want me to stop seeing him because they think he's a bad influence on me.  I'm 16 and he's 17.  I'm a good student, my grades are good, I have plans to go to college but my Mom and Dad are afraid I'll get pregnant or something and they don't like him because he smokes and drinks beer and even though they know his parents they want me to stop seeing him.  I don't want to get in trouble because I'm not going to stop seeing him but I don't want to sneak around, what should I do?

Ashley - Alameda

Love Doctor -

I don't know if I should seek therapy or just leave.  I have been with my husband since I was 19. We didn't have a lot of time together before we had our first child. He is a good man, a professional man and has provided a good home for me and our two lovely - grown children - who still live with us.  Love Doc, I feel we have done our job, we provided our children with a good home, a great education, and now that they are in their early 20s it's time for them to leave the nest.  I want my husband and I to enjoy what we've built, not let my freeloading kids spoil my fun.  Don't get me wrong Love Doc.  my children are good kids, just young and immature and happy so happy to have Mommy and Daddy still take care of them.  They work, but do not contribute to household expenses, or cleaning unless I nag them and they don't offer any help either.  Instead they blow their money on clothes, dating and other fun things.  I am more than happy to help them get started with a little contribution to their own apartments, but my husband insist on letting them stay.  I get it times are tough but it builds character and makes you appreciate what you have more.  My husband thinks I'm being mean, I say, they need to stand on their own two feet.  What do you say, we agreed to go by your decision as the tie-breaker.

Need some Me Time in Pleasanton

Love Doctor,

For the past year my wife has become "Green" obsessed as she is on a crusade to recycle.  Not only are we composting and have bins for recycling filled to the hilt but now she has taken up recycling vegatble oil for her eco-car which is not all that pleasant to have your garage filled with so much clutter that I have to park out in the street.  I am all for recycling and keeping the planet clean for our kids but it's gotten so the kids are afraid to throw anything away because "mom is freaking out again".  She's a lovely woman but ever since she's gotten on this green obsession she seems to be a different person.  I just want my wife back.  Help me Love Doctor!

Sam in Berkeley

Love Doctor - 

I've been with the same person for 5 years.  We love each other but I see no future in this relationship.  I'm not one to bring up marriage which I know my boyfriend is happy about but where am I headed with this guy.  He's content with the way things are and sometimes he'll bring up marriage. I think I'm just comfortable for him but I feel like we're not growing togther.   He says he wants kids and I do too, I'm just not sure I want kids with him.  He's a good guy but a little unmotivated.  I don't want to hurt him but I think it's time to move on. What do you think?

Not miserable just too comfortable in San Francisco

Need your suggestions Love Doctor:

Love Doctor, what going on here? I  work hard, a good woman, pleasant, good conversationalist.  Why can't I find a good man and I do not club anymore. 

Angela - Oakland 

Dear Love Doctor:

My story is not new. Married my high school sweetheart. The only man I've ever been with and we both have great careers two kids. We have a very nice life together, but  I'm sitting here at my desk wondering what it would be like to be with another man.  I love my husband but I find my life getting well...boring.  There is a new guy in my office, he's so handsome he takes my breath away and he is a big flirt.  I thought he was paying extra attention to me but he flirts with everyone, but then my co-worker told me he is extra friendly with me.  Now he has asked me out to lunch a couple of times but I turn him down because and he knows I'm married, but it is definitely getting more and more difficult to turn him down.  I fantasize about him all the time and I think I might go to lunch with him the next time he asks...what do you think it's just lunch after all.

Fantasizing in San Jose

Love Doc:

My wife is always late.  No matter what we do, we set the clock forward and I call and remind her to get ready, I have our kids remind her and even enlisted her mother.  I even have threatened to leave without her, drove around the block and she still wasn't ready.  It's ok when it's just me and the kids but sometimes we have work funcftions we need to attend to network and show our respective companies that we are good employees and team players at social events.  My wife says that it is okay that we are "fashionably late"  Are you kidding?   It is embarassing to arrive at dinner parties as people are already seated and starting the first course.  I don't know what to do with her.  I have a really important dinner with my boss and his wife next week and I cannot arrive late.  How do I get her to be on time?

Ray - Walnut Creek

Love Doc:

I need help.  Most guys would love to have my problem.  My wife says I can go hang out with the boys all I want and do whatever I want except actually cheat on her.  I can stay out late, I can drink and she'll come get me.  So what's the problem?  I think she is having an affair and with one of my buddies.  He started to not show up at our get togethers when I am there and I see his stuff lying around my house but he's over lot and one of my best friends so he leaves his stuff over all the time, but usually they don't smell like cologne.  I've asked my wife, "What do you do when I go out?" and she is always vague and said oh had one of my girlfriends over.  There are other signs but I don't know what I should do, stay home and or try to catch them.  I don't know I'd handle that but I just want to know.  What should I do?

Love Dr:

I am in love with my best friend's wife...we all use to hang out in a little group but everyone starting pairing off.  My best friend beat me to the punch but he didn't know I was in love with her.  We've all been great friends for 10 years and everyone was happy when they got married, me too but sad for myself.  They've only been married for a year, but lately she has been flirting with me and she almost kissed me the other night in their kitchen but stopped when she thought she hear her husband coming back in from picking up our other friend.

I make sure I'm not alone with her now so I am not tempted but I love her but my best friend is like my brother...but if I can shouldn't I take my shot?  It's eating me up inside...what do I do?

Dear Love Doctor:

Should it be a deal breaker when my gentlemen friend of 4 years makes travel plans to spend his b-day without me?  He made the plans & purchased his ticket last October. I told him about my plans to celebrate his b-day last week and that's when he told me about plans he made 3 months ago!!  Come on, he could have told me sooner and without me having to ask! Deal breaker or no?

Connie, Oakland

I have a friend (male) that is living with a piece of lead, meaning she doesn't contribute to the well-being of my best friend. She brags that he is happy and pays all the bills, but I know for a fact that he is out doing other things if you know what I mean (wink). If a man has suppose to be a good woman @ home why is he in the streets?  Male point of view - please clarify.

Sunshine - Castro Valley

Dear Love Doctor, 

I was with my daughters father for 18 years.  After many years of petty issues I moved forward with another man who is a commitment phobe.  His excuse for the last 9 years was he thought i would go back to my daughters dad.  Last year after not seeing my daughters father for 5 years we reconnected and sparks flew as always.  We became close again but never stopped to think of this person i was with for 9 years nor the woman who bought him a home.  Out of obligation we decided to stick with the people we were with but we are both miserable with our decision. The commitment phobe decided to get it together and wants a serious commitment (possibly because of fear of losing me completely). These are really good people just not the ones for us. Do we break it off with these people or stick with second best?

Kim - Union City

Love Doctor:

I am an single parent raising two kids, and now I am in a relationship for about three months now.  I did tell my boyfriend that my daughter was spoiled only because my kids only really have me to discipline them. Everything was going well, until about two wks ago. And he has now brought to my attention, that its my fault the kids are not behaving and respecting me.  He has stated he wants to pull back but he loves me and wants me to use this time to focus on disciplining my children. Should I continue in this relationship, or should I just leave? I know he wants us to be together, but I feel like I'm on a timeclock, and I am truly not feeling this and the way I feel. Please help.

Tanya - Richmond

Dear Love Doc:

Here's my dilemma,  I met my current live in boyfriend when I was 15 yrs old. We got together when I was 16, he was 19. We were immature, breaking up for no reason. But while we were together, we constantly made plans that were going to be together and start a family. He told me that he never wanted kids or a family until he met me. Stupidly, I believed him. So when we broke up for the last time,I told him I didn't want him back. So what did this ignorant fool do? He slept with a big whale without a condom and blamed it on the weed and alcohol influence and this was a terrible mistake. My question is, should I just stay with him since he is helping  to pay my bills and stop wanting to have a child with him? Or leave him and his alone and struggle by myself alone? I think  he loves me, he did buy my a ring for Christmas but everytime his child comes over we never get along. We don't talk and we always get into it. Please help. 

Confused in San Lorenzo

Dear Love Doctor:

My boyfriend of 3 years, by the way has been unemployed for the last 2 years sits at home all day and calls me at work. I try to encourage him to look for a job but he states there is nothing out there. I am trying to be understanding what do I do?

Nice Girl - Oakland

Dear Love Doctor:

I recently ran into my ex that left me when i was pregnant with his child. He's maried now (filing for divorce) with 3 kids and wants to pick up where we left off. I do love him and do want him back but not sure if it will work. What should I do?

Rita - Oakland

Love Doctor

Or anyone who can help me make since of my significant other who i recently noticed is skipping showers or taking one to two minute showers and to top it off thingks its ok to not use a rag to wash with, just soap and two minute water! And last but not least not brushing his teeth its driving me crazy. Just down right unsanitary! And he has the nerve to blame me for not having a active sex life.Even his kids tells him his breath stinks and for some unknown reason he trys to act like we are jokinjg when we say his breath smells like a dirty diaper, well i know im not! LOVE DOCTOR what can i do to get rid of pig-pin and his yellow teeth and new bad habits?

Kaneesha - Oakland

Dear Love Dr.:

My long-tiime boyfriend finally popped the question and I must say he did it well.  Romantic getaway, on the beach and sunset, he proposed.  I love him and want to spend the rest of my life with him, but he refuses to adopt my two children.

He says he loves them and I know he does, we've been together for over 7 years.  He treats them like they're his own, and the kids real father is out of the picture which I won't get into, but he has never shirked taking care of the kids, and says he wants to have one of our own.

He says it wouldn't be right for him to adopt them but he has always helped me out with money or babysitting whenever I was a little short or needed to run out. Luckily the children are young enough so they won't understand these adult matters, but Love Doctor, I don't know what to do.  I love him but kids are my priority.  Should I marry him anyway and hope that he'll change his mind?

Dear Dr. Love:

I know you have dealt with this before, but I saw my best friends husband at a hotel with his step-daughter, my best friend's daughter from a previous marriage.  The daughter is 27 so she knows better but it would devastate my best friend to learn that her husband who is twice this girl's age is not only cheating but cheating with her daughter. At first,  I thought maybe it's an innocent misunderstanding and I was just juming to conclusions, but my business takes me in the vicinity of the hotel they have been meeting at and while I can't say I'm not completely innocent of spying, he saw me one day and turned so pale he looked like a ghost.  He asked me not to say anything and that he was ending the affair and that if my friend found out it would kill her and that he loves her still.  I don't know what to do.  I feel like she's my friend and I should tell her, but I have no real proof and he could always deny it and I will have lost a dear friend, but what good will it do if I do tell her other than break her heart especially since it's with her daughter.  Knowing this horrilbe secret is killing me. Help me Dr. Love!

Jennifer - in need of advice

Dear Love Doctor:

I'm sick and tired of my boyfriend of 5 years.  We just started to live together and he's a slob, and doesn't help with any of the things around the house.  All he does is invite his friends over and order pizza then leaves the mess for me to clean.   Recently his best friend has been paying attention to me, through no prompting on my part and I have to say I find him quite attractive. When he comes over, he brings either food or wine.  Helps clean up and helps me clean up after the fool and his boys. He actually talks to me and treats me with respect and though he has confessed he is attracted to me, he said he wouldn't be so disrespectful to his friend or me by doing anything inappropriate.  I  am seriously ready to kick my boyfriend out, but these guys work together and I'm concerned that it might cause problems for my potential new guy.   Should I just go for it?

Fed up in San Jose

Dear Love Doc:

I am in the doghouse, as I completely forgot my wife's birthday a few weeks ago. I won't go into details but I did lose my Blackberry which would have reminded me.  She is so angry with me still and we argue about it almost every night. We have only been married 2 years but have been together for 4.  She feels like I don't care enough about her to remember her birthday.  What's worse is for my Birthday she surprised me with a weekend ski trip and all the stuff that I love to do.  I love my wife but what can I do to smooth this over because it's not just about gifts, she thinks I take her for granted? 

George - Oakland

Dear Love Doctor, 

I am in love with a girl in my school.  I have been telling my best friend my feelings about her.  The other day, he told me he has been in love with her too!!!  I can't believe I trusted him with my secret.  Should I keep him as a friend or clip the cord because I can't trust him anymore.  

Francisco

I recently ran into my ex that left me when i was pregnant with his child. He's maried now (filing for divorce) with 3 kids and wants to pick up where we left off. I do love him and do want him back but not sure if it will work. What should I do?

Rita - Oakland

I saw my good friends boyfriend of 10 years  getting out of a car at a bus stop with another woman I thought it was my friend so I waved at them as i was driving by, then realized that it was another woman. He did see me but backed up against the wall with the lady. Should i call my friend and ask why didn't she wave back after I saw you at the bus stop, so that would open the door to whether she new what was going on. Ot may be nothing but he has in the past cheated on her a few times and I hate meddling but if it was me I would want to know.

(A concerned friend)

Why won't he grow up?   My Boyfriend and I have 2 kids and yet all he has are friends that have NO kids and he wants to hang out with them all night and weekends. And to make matters worse his Best Friend is Happy were breaking up He says "Well at least I have my friend back" Everyone says it If he's best Friend wasn't in the picture he would be ready to settle down??? What do I do, Do I stay and put up with him partying everynight or leave and let him and best Friend stay together forever.

Jay - Bay Area

I recently have become involved with a man whom confessed he has has a secret crush on me. The issue is that he has just broken up with his girl friend of a year just as he moved out she announces she is pregnant so there has been drama. We have been seeing each other for about 2 months it is still early I can't really call it a relationship yet but i enjoy being with him but I know the baby mama drama is going to increase once this child is born. She constantly calls has her family calling for anything this is causing a problem for me he seems not to be bothered he says he plans on being a responsbile father. So I think I should bow out gracefuly now before it goes any further but I  really like him, should I run for the hells now and keep it movin?

Tracy - Oakland

My husband of 4 year recently asked me to give up on my dream of becoming a famous singer.  Before we married he was aware of my aspirations.  He has suppported me for the most part up until recently.  He has finally found his nitch and wants me to come on board. I support him 100%, but I refuse to give up on my dream.  It's been a while since I've had any gigs, so he argues that I'm not benefitting the family, though we both work regular jobs as well.  so, should I stand my ground or give in?

I Just Want to Sing - East Bay

I'm married. Is it ok to have friends with benefits? My husband has no intimate feelings towards me.

Stephanie - San Francisco

My boyfriend recently went on vacation. The friend he claimed to go with, called the house looking for him while he was gone.  hmmm.  I keep asking him about the vacation and if he & his friend had a good time.  He keeps perpetuating the lie and conveniently "lost" his camera.  I am fed up.  Should I confront him or just say see ya later?

Jen - East Bay

My husband is a good man, good provider, encourages me in my career, good with the kids, so what's wrong?  Body odor.  They say love conquers all but I don't know what to do any more.  He showers, we've seen doctors but nothing seems to help.  It is almost a deal breaker.  I love my husband very much but when he comes home and hugs me, I am starting to  dread it.  He's fine right after he showers but couple of hours later, I almost need a gas mask.  I don't know what to do any more.  Any advice Love Doctor?

Jenny - Oakland

I've been married for 17 yrs.  The last 2 yrs my spouse goes out with friends (some married/some single) without me and doesn't come home until 3AM-4AM at least 2-3 times a month. My spouse doesn't see this as disrespect to me or the marriage. Is it asking too much to not go out so often and not stay out so late every time??

Finally Fed up in Benicia

Submit your love problem to the Love Doctor. No more than 10 lines please. Listen to the Love Doctor every Monday morning at 7:50am to see if he can help solve your love problem.